Never shoulda kissed that frog May 11, 2005, 01:55:24 PM

At first I thought that the faint noise outside my kitchen window was the chirp of a cricket. Day by day the noise deepened and grew much louder. When I investigated I was astonished to find a tiny frog, merely an inch and a half long, broadcasting his basso aria to the world. Even in this age of miniaturization, thousands of dollars worth of electronics could never produce so much amplification. I like frogs. As a kid, I waded into a mud-bottomed pond where I loved to watch schools of black pollywogs darting about. Occasionally I managed to touch one between my thumb and forefinger just for a velvety second. In a few days the pollywogs sprouted little legs and arms, eventually shedding their tails. I spent hours watching them hop ashore by the dozens. My noisy kitchen frog came to mind one day when I spotted a well made little bronze frog in a shop. That purchase was my first stumble down what was to become a slippery, slimy slope. Friends and relatives, noting my interest in frogs, decided I collected them. Never, in my wildest dreams, did I realize how many faux frogs are out there looking for homes. Ceramic frogs came through the door as hostess gifts; stuffed frogs arrived by UPS; frogs jumped out at me from beneath Christmas trees; frogs begged to be pinned to my jacket; soap frogs appeared at the edge of my bathtub; planter frogs surrounded houseplants. Frog species may be endangered - but not in my house. I had become an accidental collector. It happens to lots of people - it happened to my mother. Nobody in my family remembers when my mother bought her first pair of salt and pepper shakers. I believe that she acquired a few sets because she was fascinated with their different materials; one pair was made from corncobs; two stalwart Mounties were cast from Canadian copper. I was particularly fond of a pair made from gourds in the shape of a "mammy and pappy." These days they would be called "black memorabilia." Rarely did a dinner or house guest arrive without a pair of salt and pepper shakers. Every week Mother complained when she grew heartily sick of wiping Kansas dust from beneath them. A friend of mine likes giraffes. When last I visited her I noticed that she was experiencing a population explosion of adorable long-necked creatures. I know she didn't go out to buy all of them. Several friends who are cat lovers find themselves overwhelmed with real and simulated cats. Cats are so cute. They festoon everything from greeting cards to cartoons, to pillows to Christmas ornaments, to jewelry. Some of my friends shelter more cats than reside at the pound. Cats are even more pervasive than frogs. Next time you buy a gift, ignore the Golden Rule. Don't do unto others as they have done unto you. Virginia Cornell, http://www.manifestpub.com

[back]